for a multi national world renowned wildy famous company like swarovski.

they sure have a shitty website....


__

i'd guess i just have to go down.

chee bye.

...alot of times, i just feel defeated.


I'm not angry. mad. jealous. depressed or anything....

well...maybe just a little jealous.

but most times.... I just feel so discouraged.

perhaps its just not meant to be.


i dont know what else i can do nor should do anymore.

I just blindly follow my instincts.
sometimes its good, but most times its bad.

but since i have no directions or instructions. i think i have no choice but to continue following where my fancy (instinct) brings me.


what i lack in charm or dashing apperance, i make up in dogged determination.

but the scary part is i dont know where it will bring me.

i fear. but i'd walk into that fucking hole all the same.
i know what awaits me. but fucking i'm walking the walk.



and most times, when i listen to this song..., i just find frank sinatra a genius.


I know I stand in line,
until you think you have the time
to spend an evening with me

And if we go some place to dance
I know that there's a chance
you won't be leaving with me

And afterwards we drop into a quiet little place
and have a drink or two
And then I go and spoilt it all
by saying something stupid
like :"I love you"

I can see it in your eyes,
you despite the same old lies
you heard the night before

And though it's just a lie to you
for me it's true
it never seemed so right before

I practice everyday
to find some clever lines to say
to make the meaning come true

But then I think I'll wait
until the evening gets late
and I'm alone with you

The time is right
your perfume fills my head
the stars get red
and oh, the night's so blue

And then I go and spoil it all
by saying something stupid
like: "I love you"

The time is right
your perfume fills my head
the stars get red
and oh, the night's so blue

And then I go and spoil it all
by saying something stupid
like: "I love you"

"I love you"
"I love you"
"I love you"

... ...booking in. in 1 hr.

gotta leave in a half hour.

next week, saturday gotta stay in. why?

Semi Automatic Weapon Live Range =]
My new wife. M249 SAW
First time i'll get to fire my new wife.
she's heavier than my ex-wife.
more powerful than my ex-wife.
and she can BANG FASTER than my ex-wife.
eh eh eh.

=] =] =]

out on saturday night.


anyway. altho i'm semi enthu about the range, i cant help but feel alittle depressed about booking in.
its not easy staying there for 5 days. when your loved ones and friends can only be reached by phone. of cos, i can always see them during the weekends.
but then, its not easy dividing time between family and friends.
sometimes i get a feeling of like "i'm-a-rotten- son/friend(del where applicable.)"

i try to divide my time as propotionally as i can. but usually i fail. its not easy. infact , i dont think its pretty much possible time. i just have to much to do yet so little time. ask any stay in NS man, i think we all pretty much feel the same.



and so it sucks.
but i dont have much of a choice.
sheesh.

alright. i got to go now. in a rush because i'm blogging.
haha. see what i mean.
ok ciao!

guys, please call me to chat when you have the time.
smses would be great too!