I just can't be fucked!
hahahahhaa!
I just don't care!
anyway, sorry for the outburst, I just... cant be fucked!
Getting on, Fable2 is like, the best RPG game I have ever played. I'm like this fucking evil kick ass warrior who has like jedi and sith powers. I'm like darth vadar and obi wan kenobi fucking combined. My invisible force magic fucks up anything around me and if anything is not fucked up enough, I just rain lighting till they are fucking fucked up charred. I'm like 50 cent meets tupac and they had sex with beyonce and out came my fucking kick ass evil warrior who fucks about with backstreetboys for fun.
I havent even got to my fucking japanese inspired sashimi slicing MASTER KANTANA whom I have nickamed MASTUR CUNT-TANA! That shit slices through zombies and useless civilians so quick those iron chefs in iron chef would quake in horror and call me daddy while singing a silly japanese banzai song.
Fuck, I'm bad ass. Like, reallllyyy bad ass.
Like when I meet this poor beggar
"dear mighty warrior, would you give me some money to poor ole me?"
Without saying a word, my cuntana left its sheath with a cool whistle of death and I laid a thousand sword marks all over his wrinkly old writhing body faster than you can say " wha da fuck?"
Actually, I do that old poor bastard in so much and so quick, you probably wont even finnish the one syllabus of the word "what" before he hits the deck with his guts all over the floor and his poor head rolls towards the general direction of Mcdonalds.
and when I hit the village, I got all sorts of hot tamales who want to have babies with me. Like fucking fo real in some backstreet wagons or that huge ass castle of a house I bought with my ill gotten grains of gold. Some days when I feel dirty, I bed the whores down at the shit house where the criminals gather. Some days when I feel like some high class pussy, I hit fairfax towers where those hot ass broads in their victorian costumes actually pay me to boogie with them.
Then this particular broad from the gypsy village was so hot, she actually convinced me to marry her. I dont know what I was snorting but I agreed. We then went back to this kickass pussy wagon which I bought as our maritial palace. I pimped out that palace with fucking 40'' LCD tellys and like fucking persian rugs. My toilets were made of solid gold, the bidet was encrusted full of diamonds, this is the shit that Saddam Hussein would fucking kill for.
We shagged all night and the next morning I wasnt feel so evil fucking warrior like cause the bitch was a monster in bed. She left me feeling like some fucking infant who just got shite out of some fat fishmongers wife.
But no matter. After clearing my head with some fucking awesome tasting magic potion, I was well on my way. Seeing how I was now a married man, I just wanted to go out and cheat on my newly wedded wife with some dirty hoe.
God damn it was fun! I had like, 5 hoes with me and it was balls shattering. The little hotel room I got for the night wasnt enough to contain all that hotness and the party sorta spilled into the hallway of the hotel room. God damn it was a party to remember.
The next day, I got abit sick of all the partying and I decided to go get myself some general destruction. I rode into the town of BrokesCreek and headed to the town center. There in the middle of the day, I fucking sliced off the head of some random passerby. God that felt great. The local sheriff caught me doing that and he sent some of his useless fuck ass homo homies after me. I killed them all. I cause so much sweet sweet visceral carnage that just killing all those useless gay pricks wasnt enough for me.
I walked down every single street and killed everyone with my magic powers, frying them like dough fritters or slamming them into the walls and sidewalks just like how an indian man makes prata. That was god damn awesome. Men, women, hot women, kids, pet dogs, everything I saw, I slaughtered.
Then I stomped around the empty and burning town smelling of barbequed corpses pretending I was fucking kingkong. Then I decided I liked this dump of a place and so I proclaimed myself King.
God damn its awesome. I wonder what I should do next.