seriously, its 8am. i slept at 6. its barely 2 hours.
damn an sms.
Seriously, if its bad news, you are buying dinner.
Friday, January 11, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Perhaps, its time to pat myself on the back.
I've been back almost 2 months and I must admit, I am very impressed at my self discipline thus far.
No side tracking, no false thoughts and definitely, most definitely, no episodes of disastrous and self harming ideologies of fallacy.
Sometime in September, or was it October, I set myself a list of behaviour cues. I must say, I have stuck to my guns and have been rewarded somewhat fruitfully.
I must say, its not all my own effort. Playing video games through the night with muizz, watching movies with shawn, shooting with mx, laughing with luwin and hanging out with jess has made time fly before my very eyes.
Times that I spent with friends have been indeed extremely enjoyable and ever more sweet compared with the solidarly months I spent in Australia.
Times spent alone have been equally enjoyable. A drink, a book, some fags and a couple of hours still seem to do the trick for me. Shopping has been fantastic as well. With me spending money on things without much thought, its as though the 6 weeks passed has just been a wonderful release of tension for me. Like a spring that had been tightly wound for a couple of months releasing some what violently within this short few weeks.
At this juncture, I feel as re energized and am seemingly ready to assault the next objective with vigour and enthusiasm.
What this entry is essentially about, is the satisfaction that I feel for myself.
Seemingly, I have been as resolute as I have ever hoped to be. Knuckingly down and going about the things that are important to me. It feels good, really good to be kind to oneself.
I have met all the people that I wanted to meet and done most of the things that I wanted to do. I have watched the movies that I have wanted to watch and bought most of the junk that I really want to buy. (although this is debatable. There is still the small matter of the Sigma 17-50mm f2.8 HSM which will burn a small hole in my pocket.)
Contentment. I suppose thats the word that everyone should try and find. Yes, I recognise that somethings are there to be fought tooth and nail for. But I also recognise when and where to beat a hasty retreat for reasons of self preservation.
The good man stays to fight the good fights.
But the smart man chooses the fights to fight.
I've fought myself countless times in the past. But with maturity ( i think thats the appropirate word), I now think about very carefully about the things that I allow disturb or distress me.
Its really not all about butterflies and sleepy dreamy afternoons.
What I reckon its really about, is choosing the good people to meet and the good places to eat.
The rest, I reckon pretty seriously, are quite arbitrary.
I've been back almost 2 months and I must admit, I am very impressed at my self discipline thus far.
No side tracking, no false thoughts and definitely, most definitely, no episodes of disastrous and self harming ideologies of fallacy.
Sometime in September, or was it October, I set myself a list of behaviour cues. I must say, I have stuck to my guns and have been rewarded somewhat fruitfully.
I must say, its not all my own effort. Playing video games through the night with muizz, watching movies with shawn, shooting with mx, laughing with luwin and hanging out with jess has made time fly before my very eyes.
Times that I spent with friends have been indeed extremely enjoyable and ever more sweet compared with the solidarly months I spent in Australia.
Times spent alone have been equally enjoyable. A drink, a book, some fags and a couple of hours still seem to do the trick for me. Shopping has been fantastic as well. With me spending money on things without much thought, its as though the 6 weeks passed has just been a wonderful release of tension for me. Like a spring that had been tightly wound for a couple of months releasing some what violently within this short few weeks.
At this juncture, I feel as re energized and am seemingly ready to assault the next objective with vigour and enthusiasm.
What this entry is essentially about, is the satisfaction that I feel for myself.
Seemingly, I have been as resolute as I have ever hoped to be. Knuckingly down and going about the things that are important to me. It feels good, really good to be kind to oneself.
I have met all the people that I wanted to meet and done most of the things that I wanted to do. I have watched the movies that I have wanted to watch and bought most of the junk that I really want to buy. (although this is debatable. There is still the small matter of the Sigma 17-50mm f2.8 HSM which will burn a small hole in my pocket.)
Contentment. I suppose thats the word that everyone should try and find. Yes, I recognise that somethings are there to be fought tooth and nail for. But I also recognise when and where to beat a hasty retreat for reasons of self preservation.
The good man stays to fight the good fights.
But the smart man chooses the fights to fight.
I've fought myself countless times in the past. But with maturity ( i think thats the appropirate word), I now think about very carefully about the things that I allow disturb or distress me.
Its really not all about butterflies and sleepy dreamy afternoons.
What I reckon its really about, is choosing the good people to meet and the good places to eat.
The rest, I reckon pretty seriously, are quite arbitrary.
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