nothing of note happened today.

picked up some stuff at town.

feel like shit... shall not elaborate. something that happened in camp.

thats all.

tim burton's oyster boy is very good.
extremely funny.
morbid humour.
check it out at kino.
its going fer 23 bucks. hard cover.

its too swollen.

even if we do an x-ray or an MRI now, we cant really see anything.

-_-'

There are 3 main ligaments in your ankle.

of which 2 may be broken or torn.

Your tighest band around your ankle is particulary badly damaged.

at this stage we cant tell with the whole ankle so swollen.

what you are experiencing now is called a recurrent ankle sprain.

I will send you for physio. The first few sessions will be to ease the pain.

the next sessions thereafter will be to train up your muscle endurance to let you function as normal as possible again.

Your ankle will never recover to the state it once was. There is no 100% recovery rate for your injury.

You will not be able to take part in strenous activity for the next 6 weeks. thereafter, we will ascertain your situation and see if surgery is needed. Even if you opt out of surgery, you will rest your ankle for the next 3 months.

Surgery is a double edge sword. Without it, your ankle will be very loose and will be sprained extremely easily. Some people can easily sprain their ankle 20 times in a life time. You will never be able to take part in games like soccer with your condition. Its very detrimental to the ankle not to mention that you could damage it further.

With surgery, your ankle will be tightened. you will lose some range of motion. thats to say that you will find your ankle a little tight and that it will not be as flexible as it use to be. Its very difficult in surgery to atain a perfect balance between strength and flexibility.

But with this surgery and with proper rest and rehab, you will be able to play games and function normally after some time.

The operation will consist of cutting open your ankle, getting the torn or broken liagents, getting them sticthed up together.

.............................................................

fuck shit.

i'm shit scared.

sounds awfully painful.

whiles its already painful.

i hope the doctor was not scaring me.

i cant take this kind of stress.

first a fracture, now this kinda thing.

its driving me mad.

but still. i'll walk as far as i can just to see you.

its that time of the week again....


1 hour to book in. very sad. depressed.

oh no = [

i'm going outfield again this week. out of 5 days, 4 days in jungle.

argh. i dont mind it. but not so freaking often lar!

as i was telling luwin.

"
last week outfield liao, this week out field again. next 2 weeks outfield again. before i know it. brunei here i come.. -_- "


many of you would say that going brunei would be fun.
well my serg already told me.
brunei got 3 Ms
Mountain. Mud. Mosquitoes.

woot!


argh.
just venting. dont mind me.

... a code

worked on another one.
after some time.
another one is done.

another one for you to upload.

its not bad at all.

hurry go look =]

fug em bastards.

after a good night chilling at the beach with fn and azhani.

after a good breakfast at macs with fn.

after a good morning of shooting the sun rise.

i came back to front head lines of another terror attack.

AT LEAST 25 DEAD, INCLUDING TOURIST IN BALI BOMB ATTACK.



fuck them bastards.
its times like these that causes me to feel that the human race has no hope anymore.



its also times like these, that make me feel that my own problems in life are far more insignificant as compared to others who are less fortunate.

shucks. why? why? why?





WHY?



cb terrorist.

for a multi national world renowned wildy famous company like swarovski.

they sure have a shitty website....


__

i'd guess i just have to go down.

chee bye.

...alot of times, i just feel defeated.


I'm not angry. mad. jealous. depressed or anything....

well...maybe just a little jealous.

but most times.... I just feel so discouraged.

perhaps its just not meant to be.


i dont know what else i can do nor should do anymore.

I just blindly follow my instincts.
sometimes its good, but most times its bad.

but since i have no directions or instructions. i think i have no choice but to continue following where my fancy (instinct) brings me.


what i lack in charm or dashing apperance, i make up in dogged determination.

but the scary part is i dont know where it will bring me.

i fear. but i'd walk into that fucking hole all the same.
i know what awaits me. but fucking i'm walking the walk.



and most times, when i listen to this song..., i just find frank sinatra a genius.


I know I stand in line,
until you think you have the time
to spend an evening with me

And if we go some place to dance
I know that there's a chance
you won't be leaving with me

And afterwards we drop into a quiet little place
and have a drink or two
And then I go and spoilt it all
by saying something stupid
like :"I love you"

I can see it in your eyes,
you despite the same old lies
you heard the night before

And though it's just a lie to you
for me it's true
it never seemed so right before

I practice everyday
to find some clever lines to say
to make the meaning come true

But then I think I'll wait
until the evening gets late
and I'm alone with you

The time is right
your perfume fills my head
the stars get red
and oh, the night's so blue

And then I go and spoil it all
by saying something stupid
like: "I love you"

The time is right
your perfume fills my head
the stars get red
and oh, the night's so blue

And then I go and spoil it all
by saying something stupid
like: "I love you"

"I love you"
"I love you"
"I love you"

... ...booking in. in 1 hr.

gotta leave in a half hour.

next week, saturday gotta stay in. why?

Semi Automatic Weapon Live Range =]
My new wife. M249 SAW
First time i'll get to fire my new wife.
she's heavier than my ex-wife.
more powerful than my ex-wife.
and she can BANG FASTER than my ex-wife.
eh eh eh.

=] =] =]

out on saturday night.


anyway. altho i'm semi enthu about the range, i cant help but feel alittle depressed about booking in.
its not easy staying there for 5 days. when your loved ones and friends can only be reached by phone. of cos, i can always see them during the weekends.
but then, its not easy dividing time between family and friends.
sometimes i get a feeling of like "i'm-a-rotten- son/friend(del where applicable.)"

i try to divide my time as propotionally as i can. but usually i fail. its not easy. infact , i dont think its pretty much possible time. i just have to much to do yet so little time. ask any stay in NS man, i think we all pretty much feel the same.



and so it sucks.
but i dont have much of a choice.
sheesh.

alright. i got to go now. in a rush because i'm blogging.
haha. see what i mean.
ok ciao!

guys, please call me to chat when you have the time.
smses would be great too!

hahahaha.

its too eazy to sum up how guys feel about national service.

this is the opinion of one of my friends on being in the force.
i quote :-



"We are the unfortunate, led by the unqualified, to do the unnecessary for the ungrateful."




i dont quite agree with it but you have to agree its quite damn funny. =]

... ...on music

anyway, i'm listening to nirvana. (dont ask me why.)

and yea, i sometimes find myself bobbing my head to the music.

but after sometime, i lose track of what i'm listening too.
is that lithium? or heartshape box? they kinda sound the same.

not to mention that the lyrics dont mean shit mostly leaves me going ?!?!?!?$%^&?@!?#!

and yea, after that, i sometimes find myself bobbing my head.
thanking god that Cobain is dead =]

... 296th post
and counting.

all he wants to do. is to look at her thru the lenses of his camera.

he was there waiting.
yea, and she arrived with a big smile.

and so, they headed to this little italian restraunt for dinner.
the grub was good.
the dessert, was better.
the pellegrino served in wine glasses (dont ask me why), where cheap.
an old english couple were looking at them. the old lady was charming.
"is it your birthday? " she asked.
heh.
they left shortly after. and so did they.

they took a walk. at the shops.
looking at the wares.
it wasnt exciting but it was fufilling.
the shops were closing. they had to go.

they took a walk. down the bay.
he lighted light sticks.
2 red and 2 a yellow hue.
2, another one and a last one.
they littled. litter bugs. but they never did get caught.
luminous sticks floating in the water, if only the moment could last forever.

the half fish thing was puking.
the tourist were irritating.
but no, they wasnt bothered.
and no,
he wasnt smoking.
he was too busy. looking. enjoying her company.


cant take my eyes off you. cant take my eyes off you.

she was racing.
sometimes swearing.
he was looking.
she was smiling.
he was shooting.
the moon was full.
the photos were gorgeous.
and the camera had nothing to do with it.

it was late. very quite late.
she had to go.
cinderella. before 12. they had to leave.
and so a pumpking carriage was hailed.
a silver one.
and off they went.
back to her humble abode.

reached their destination.. the journey was too short he feels.
took the rocket up to her place.
bid her goodbye.
he went downstairs. feeling mighty fine.
and so he left.
and there is not much left to tell.


cant take my mind of you. cant take my mind of you.

who is she?
he wont tell.
who he is?
she wont tell.

who are they you are asking me.
are you fucking joking? heh.
as if. i would. tell you. k-poh.


the end...

a code:

memories fade.
but photos dont.
well, at least digital photos dont.

go look =]

... this is a shit hole.


SAF BMTC ePosting Order
NRIC:
S8517975F
Name:
LOW YI QIAN



Comd SAF BMTC congratulates you for your successful completion of the BMT.



Your Posting Order is listed below:



1.You are posted to 3 SIR.
2.Your vocation is RIFLEMAN.
3. Your are to report to: Selarang Camp, BLK 28, RM #01-01.

Reporting Date/Time:
19/09/2005 at 0800 hrs.

Person to report to:
Chief Clerk

Contact Number:
65404489/62497210

You are required to report in smart no.4 uniform (PES E recruits to be in No 3 uniform), except for those assigned to Police Force.

4. Special Instruction:
You are required to bring along your duffle bag / field pack complete with the SAF issued items given during BMT. You are expected to stay in.








shit. My only consolation is that during this 2 years, i shall have to maintain my fitness.
which is good.
the bad thing is that i gotta chiong sua.
the good thing is that i getta travel.
so yea.

this is a shit hole.
=(

... ... the end of the beginning

... ... the starting of hell

or whatever you like to call it.

I'd like to think of it as Graduation Parade.

I cant really describe how i felt when I threw that jockey cap that Lta Victor put on for me.

Better than school graduation. Much better.

at least, there was no fat indian girls dancing trying to dance.

So i shall use a few stanzas taken from here and there.

Neat. as follows.

From this day
Till the ending of the world
For we in it
Shall be remembered.
We few, We happy few
We band of brothers.
For he who sheds his blood with me today
Shall be my brother.



For brothers in arms
Comrades for life
Semper fie do or die
Gung ho!
Gung ho!
Gung ho!






We are brothers in arms and brothers proud to be.

its been a fabulous journey.

thank you gryphon platoon 2.

even if you arnt here to read this.

For brothers in arms, Comrades for life ... ...

amazing.


she still makes me stutter.

..... from where i left off,

and so i have to miss the upcoming graduation parade this wednesday.

so says the learned doctor.

however,

I'm not complaining since mum n dad is not coming.

no big deal.



its been a quick 15 weeks. (at some points ridiculously slow.)

from the first day, trudging in with a pissed off face, to these last few days laughing and jeering at the new enlistees, its been a journey.

no, i didnt get company best, best shot, platoon best or whatsoever.
But i did managed to snare another award which I'm very proud off.

ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages. I present to you, newly crowned, the meanest man of gryphon platoon 2 , 23rd batch. Mr Low Yi Qian of Section 3 Bed 1.

Yes, the bed beside the window which is supposed to be haunted. but of cos its not.


Yes, I'm that bad. and yes, I'm that mean.
and no, i make no bones about it.
as i said, i'm quite proud of it.
neat.

to celebrate my new found glory, i showed the platoon just how mean i could be.

there is this guy. called the gay wild boar.
no guessing who gave him the nick name.
cue: clap for me.

not that he is not gay. but with a name like greg-something-chee-something , i just cant resists it but to disturb the dude. not to mention his is extremly gay.
literally.
he wears grandma undies.
i'ma not joking.
swear to god if i had one.


ok anyway, there i was, reading today's today paper. (the paper called "today" you stewpid.)

there was an article on something about gays.
never mind the contents of the article.
the word gay caught my eye and no it wasnt in the context of being happy.

so happily, i cut out the article.

and since mr gay wild boar booked out last night, needless to say no one was there to look after his locker.
his buddy was there, but did i mention that they both hated each other with a hatred that is akin to my hatred for spinach?

now thats something =O

and so i took.

like massive amounts of masking tape.
that no amount of handpower could get rid off,
and pasted the whole damn article in his cardboard door.

to top it all of,
i caught a colour moth. or was it a butterfly?
but thats not important. whats important is that i put it in his cardboard, and locked the damn thing.

ima just waiting to see his reaction to all this bullshit tomorro night when i book in.

heh.

come back on wednesday or thursday to find out what happened.
why?

cause i'm alil tired now.
and i have to go out later.
luwin wants to get the ipod nano.
and jessie wants to have dinner.
and i feel the need to go shopping.

aight, see you guys soon.
love you all.
wait, i mean.

I HATE THE WHOLE FUCKING LOT OF YOU ALL!

pai say, have to be in the meanest man in the platoon persona. *wink.

aftermath. post specialist appt. 425pm Changi General Hospital Clinic B. RM4



doc: ok. i give you 3 weeks excused. and physio.

me: but.... but...2 weeks...24km....grenade... POP...
*stunned into silence.

doc: i must recommend it. sorry.




I'm so sad. I could cry.
shite happens.

I've a sealed envelop with me given by the doctor.
tmr, i shall have to hand it to the medical officer in camp.
he will then decide my fate.
I would pray if i could.
but i cant, so i wont.

a code :

Somewhere only we know.

No more time to blog.

hi guys, not a substantial posting this week.

i'm doing this 5 mins before i have to prepare to book in.

basically, nothing much is happening and thats the long and short of it.

my ankle is much better. able to walk much faster now. which has too be good.

well, i'l doodle somemore when i book out. provided i feel like it.

in anycase, 2 more weeks to POP. yea.

The Attempted Redemption.

aight, new skin. how you guys find it?

decided to do it since i'm free (they sent me back for a couple of days due to a bad ankle sprain.)

give my blog a new leash of life.

credits to felicia for helping me with this.

HTML, only for geniuses and I dont pretend to be one cause I'm not.

still needs some fine tuning before its fully presentable i guess. do drop some tags to let me know how you guys find it.

aight, got to go now. see you guys at the weekend =]